I'm a westernised asian... mostly =D

What kind of Asian are YOU?

YOU KNOW YOU ARE JAPANESE IF...

* You're obsessed with you hair, your car, your clothes, your mobile or your job.

* (Females) You want to marry a white guy.

* You have gadgets that aren't available in most countries.

* You only trust & drive Japanese cars.

* You get offended easily (you're probably pissed off reading this right now).

* You know you are superior to all other Asians.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE KOREAN IF...

* You smoke and drink too much.

* You wear Polo collar shirts, have loose beige pants and have blonde highlights in your hair..

* You know what a Dalki, Pucca or Mashimaro is.

* You drive a Hyundai even though you won't admit it.

* You're offended when Westerners ask you "How do you walk with your eyes closed?"

* You know you are superior to all other Asians.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE CHINESE IF...

* You think you're the smartest people in the world.

* You have a mobile with you at all times.

* You know the abbreviation of A.B.C. & F.O.B.

* Today's steamed rice is tomorrow's fried rice.

* You outnumber the other Asians in most universities.

* You name your pet after the sound it makes (eg. Mew mew for cats & woaf woaf for dogs)

* Pets also doubles as food if they happen to die.

* You know you are superior to all other Asians - but some won't admit that they're Chinese.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE HONKIE IF...

* Sentences begin with 'Aiya' and ends with a 'La'

* Your mobile phone has decorations & toys hanging.

* You're offended if someone thinks you're from China - which you technically are.

* (Females) You're offended if someone thinks your real LV bag is fake.

* (Males) Pants can never be too tight.

* Your hair styles look like anime cartoon characters.

* You think you are on the same level as the Japanese.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE VIETNAMESE IF...

* You've gotta have fish sauce with every meal.

* You eat at restaurants with the word "Pho" on the signage.

* (Males) You can't get enough of microfibre pants & sneakers.

* (Females) You think flared pants will be in style forever.

* You have a relative who is Chinese.


* You're fond of second hand Japanese import cars.

* Everyone knows your last name is Nguyen, or you have a relative with that last name.

* Cabramatta makes you home sick.

* You know you are superior to all other Asians.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE FILIPINO IF...

* You want to be a dancer, a singer, or an actor, even though you have a day job as a nurse, an engineer, or an accountant.

* A member of your family back home is a politician or a movie star or knows one.

* You laugh when you see other Asians pay to get a fake tan.

* You wish you were black. Or think you are one.

* (Males) No pants are ever baggy enough.

* You love your Toyota's and Honda's.

* You don't care if you are superior to all other Asians or

not, because you think being Filipino is just cool in itself.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE THAI IF...

* People want to pay you for sex.

* No matter what you eat, it's not greasy or spicy enough.

* You mum seems to work out at the local gym.

* (Females) You're offended when someone asks you if you know how to do the ping pong ball trick.

* You know how to open a coconut.

* You know in your heart that you will never be superior to all other Asians, but you've learned to live with it.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE MALAYSIAN IF...

* You believe everything the government tells you.

* But are willing to change your mind if someone slips you $50.

* The whole world (and Soros) is out to suppress you and your country.

* You think that Mahathir will be around in 2020.

* You don't understand why people think you have a funny accent.

* People confuse you with the Singaporeans because you all look the same.

* You think you are superior to most other Asians, but $50 can change that too.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE SINGAPOREAN IF...

* You eat, sleep, smile and have sex according to the policies stipulated by the government in the Red Book they gave you when you were born.

* You've never seen chewing gum.

* You think the Chinese are dirty.

* You can speak more than 3 languages. You can swear in 5 languages.

* You're happy knowing that your currency is valued higher than the other Asian currencies. Except the Japs.

* You think you are superior to all other Asians, because it says so in the Red Book.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE A WESTERNISED ASIAN IF...

* You regret the fact that you didn't learn Chinese or your native Asian language properly, when you were a kid.

* Deep down you think you're white.

* As a kid, you didn't have much Asian friends.

* When you shop at an Asian grocery store, you have no idea what you are buying nor can you read any of the food packaging.

* You can speak fluent English without an accent.

* You hate talking to Asians with accents because you don't really understand them.

* (Females) You've dated a white guy.

* White Mormons can speak your native Asian language better than you can.

* You know what Holdens, Fords, MG Rovers, Mustangs & Cadillacs are. Yes they are cars!

* You don't know any Asian singers, pop stars, celebrities or actors except Jackie Chan & Bruce Lee.

* You know you are superior to all other Asians, despite the fact that they beat you at school in maths, can speak an Asian language fluently and know what they are buying in Asian grocery stores.



YOU KNOW YOU ARE AN ASIANISED WESTERNER IF...

* (Males) You find Asian women more attractive.

* (Females) You secretly find Asian men attractive - but realise they don't have the guts to ask you out.

* You know what "Ni Hao" means.

* You love Asian cuisine.

* You actually know what you are buying at Asian grocery stores.

* You don't find Beijing Mandarin irritating.

* You've been to Asia. You think the Asian culture is fascinating.

* You wanna try eat everything like they do, including dogs.

* You know you are superior to Asians but wanna be like them.

almost ghetto.. just almost haha!

1-21 = Ghetto
22-30 = Average
31-40 = Spoiled
41+ = Filthy Rich

I have a..

[x] mother
[x] father
[x] brother
[ ] sister
[ ] nephew
[x] Cell phone.
[ ] Own bathroom
[x] Own room.
[x] 2 story house
[x] Swimming pool
[x] Guest room.
[ ]laptop in my room
[ ] TV in your room
TOTAL: 8

[ ] full or bigger bed
[ ] More than 5 pairs of shoes
[ ] sunglasses/shades
[x] watch
[x] mp3 player/iPod
[ ] ps2
[ ] XBox
[ ] Nintendo DS or PSP
[ ] Gameboy Advanced
[ ] gamecube
TOTAL so far: 10 - haha.. boring house XD

[ ] basketball hoop
[ ] Air hockey table
[ ] Pool table
[ ] Ping pong table
[ ] foosball table
[ ]Trampoline
[ ] Own a surfboard/wakeboard/snowboard
TOTAL: 10 - OMFG!! as if that last section didnt make me feel bad enough already!!

[ ] Nightstand
[doesnt work] Stereo in bedroom.
[ ] DVD player in room
[ ] Have something from abercrombie and fitch or hollister
[ ] Gets $100+ each month allowance
[ ] Have something from AE
[ ] owns a gucci ,dooney & bourke, louis vuitton, coach, guess something
[ ] wears Lacoste
[ ] parents give you credit card
TOTAL: 10 ....

[ ] job
[ ] Goes shopping at least once a week
[ ] Expensive cologne/perfume
[x] Digital Camera
TOTAL: 11

[ ] electric/gas scooter
[x] Guitar/drum/Bass
[x] piano/keyboard
[x] Any other instrument
[ ] Hammock
[x] Been on a cruise.
[x] traveled out of the state
[ ] Personal trainer
[ ] expensive jewelry
[x - lol the veronicas and axel whitehead] Met a celebrity
TotaL: 17

[ ] Straightener/curling iron.
[nothing suss there..!!] Been to a batting cage
[x] $10+ on you right now
[x] Credit card or atm card,debit card
[ ] Been to Europe
[ ] Been to Hawaii
[ ]Been to NYC.
[ ] Been to Chicago.
[ ] Been to CA
[ ] Been to Florida.
[ ] Been to Mississippi.
[ ] Been to the Bahamas
TOTAL: 19

[ ] car
[x] Pet
[ ]Ranch or cabin or a get away place
[ ]more than one house
TOTAL: 20

[x] home cooked meal almost every day.
[x] Been in a limo
[ ] Been in a helicoptor
[ ] Own a camcorder
[ ] Own a laptop
TOTAL: 22

SURPRISE PARTY!! YAY!! - note: extra long blog

okes.. yesterday, as u all (should) know, was my bday. and today, was my surprise bday party =D chad got me to go to his place by using the PS2 game "winning 11" as an excuse.. even tho he knows full well that i hate that game XD (omg.. i missed the goal.. even when it was right in front of me... literally.. and the goalie wasnt even there!!)

so after school i met up with chad outside the school gym thing and i saw this massive (well kinda) group of ppl, like.. chad, step, jason, FG, and sherman.. and LG.. but he ran off somewhere... o.O"

so we got to chads place.. played winning 11.. i changed the songs a bit.. and I SCORED A GOAL!! WOOOH!! but its just a fluke =p FG told me to get some chips from the kitchen.. so i went to the kitchen.. and i took the chips from where chad usually keeps them (which was on the bench) i poured the chips into the bowls and FG suddenly pops out of the corridor going "RAWRR!!" and i was like "hm.. wtf are u doing man?!". i take the chips back to the gaming area and after a little while, FG started pulling my head back and forth into his crotch LOL and then suddenly he bouces away and i see this massive fire next to my face and the next thing i knew was everyone goes "HAPPY BDAY JEREMY" and i was like "A WHA-?? O_O" and then i read the cake and i was like "omg.. u guys actually threw a surprise party for me?!" and then i was so happy that i didnt know what to say.. i just looked around nervously >.>" but the cake was nice =D if only i ordered a mousse cake lol. THANKS SO MUCH GUYS!! hm.. what else.. jason gave me a box of matches. then he farted on my elbow, causing my to dive into chad's other sofa (i dont think he liked that..) and then they started whacking me with cushions.

yep so just to top it all off, they didnt buy me a rubix cube.. but jason DID fart on my arm XD

thanks to (in no particular order):

Chad - for letting us crash ur place + hosting my surprise party at ur place + hiding urself in the pantry for 20 minutes (or something like that) to "surprise" me.. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT THE CHIPS WERE IN THE PANTRY?!

Step - for buying the LOLlies, chips, signing the card and doing some of the "behind the scenes" work for my party =D

Fong Gor - uhm.. for doing.. stuff.... =D gee.. its so hard to write up thank you things for ppl who did stuff for ur surprise party... since u know nothing about who organised it and whatnot XD

Jason - thanks for the matches man.. i think i left them at chad's tho =S oh wait.. i KNOW i left them at chads...

Sherman!! - "ooh i'm so good. 4 vs 1 and u still havent scored a goal against me!!" LOL too bad we didnt get to play mahjong ><"

this had to be one of the awesomest bdays that i've ever had - thanks to my awesome friends =D

JeZZa

Stupidity Test: i'm 55% stupid

i got this off an email from Jeshinta. Step should remember her from Chinese school haaha

1. [x] I have walked into a glass/screen door.

2. [x] I have tripped on my shoe and fallen

3. [x] I choke on my own spit a lot

4. [x] I've seen the Matrix a bunch of times and still don't get it.

5. [] I type only with my pointer fingers.

6. [x] I have accidently caught something on fire.

7. [] I've told a cop to #### off and gotten screwed for it.

8. [x] I have attempted to sip out of a straw but it accidently went into my nose, rather than my mouth.

9. [X] i have thought of something funny, and laughed out loud and people looked at me weird.

10. [x] I've caught myself drooling

11. [] I've accidently caused an explosion.

12. []If someone says the word "fart", I can't help but laugh.

13. [] I've been into a "Do Not Enter" one way road more than 5 times

14. [x] Sometimes I just...stop thinking & zone out.

15. [x] It is POSSIBLE to lick your elbow

16. [] I just tried to lick my elbow.

17. [x] People often shake their heads and walk away from me.

18. [] People often tell me to use my "inside voice".

19. [x] Gum has fallen out of my mouth while talking.

20. [X thats what the calcumulators for!] I've used my fingers to do simple math.

21. [] I've jumped off a moving vehicle

22. [] I ate a bug for $5 or less.

23. [x] I'm taking this test when I should be doing something more important.

24. [sometimes] I repost chain letters because I'm scared of what they threaten will happen if I don't.

25. [] I've removed my pants when I was with friends

26. [] I've ran around naked when I was with friends

27. [x] I've searched all over the place for something, and then realized it was in my hand the whole time.

28. [x] I accidently break a lot of things.

29. [] my friends know not to use big words on/around me. -

30. [] I tilt my head to the side when I'm confused.

31. [X] Sometimes i start telling a story and suddenly forget what I'm talking about.

32. [x] I've fallen out of my chair before

33. [x] When I'm laying in bed, I sometimes stare at the ceiling and try to find pictures and words in the texture.

34. [X] When going to sit down, someone pulled the chair out  without me knowing and I've sat down anyways and
landed on my butt

35. [X] I've zoned out in class that when the bell rang I just sat there instead of going to my next class completely unaware that it rang.

36. [] I don't understand anything adults say.

37. [] I've had people talk slow to me lol!

38. []I have blonde hair.

39. [] I never turn down a dare no matter how crazy or embarrassing it may be.

40. [x] I do bad in school

41. [] I can't spell anything if the word has more than 7 letters

42. [x] I can be completely random.

43. [x] I'm amused by shiny objects.

44. [] I get surprised easily.

45. [] I usually don't get jokes the first time someone says one.

46. [x] I've laughed at a joke that I had no idea what it meant.

47. [x] I make it obvious when I zone out.

48. [X] I've sworn at an adult.

49. [] This quiz was hard to comprehend.

50. [] I don't know what 'comprehend' means.

Tally up your number of x's. MULTIPLY THAT NUMBER BY 2 TO GET YOUR

PERCENTAGE. Repost this as"I am __% stupid

oh wait, today is a happy happy day